Numbness…I never asked you to stay
Yet here you are day after day
You started in the leg, then the arm and now the face
I really want you to get the hell out of this place
I really wish you would leave so I felt better
I would even promise to write you a letter
It would even be great if you just let me run
I know most don’t believe me but it can be quite fun
I don’t mean to be rude but I really wouldn’t miss you a bit
Actually…if no one was looking I would probably give you a punch and a hit
So I really would like if you thought it over, the part about you leaving you see
Because you really aren’t nice to live with, but that could be just me
Well, needless to say I have been pretty quiet lately. I am kicking myself for still not posting about my trip yet but I think I have been fighting some inner demons since the end of November which in turn has given me some writers block. (Funny since I am really just retelling my life, I am not trying to write a short story for English class or something.) I am sure the clinical diagnosis would be something like mild depression but I have been referring to it as inner demons. In December my running decreased to try to “repair” my hips, stress at work increased and numbness/pain on the left side increased. Obviously not a good combination to try to fight your demons.
Two weeks ago life got even more difficult. Since I had been struggling with the numbness and pain on the left side for a few weeks my neurologist decided to prescribe me the fun five days of steroids. The last few times I had steroids it was only a three-day round however the last time I did have a five-day dose I don’t remember having the difficulties I had this last week. Every night I average 5-6 hours of sleep (I am use to getting at least 8 hours). I am not sure if the stress of work added to the lack of sleep but the mix of taking the steroids and lack of sleep really messed with me during the day. It ended up pushing me to my limits and I had to call my Mom to come over to help me take care of my three crazy huskies one night. I just had zero energy and I felt like I couldn’t even take care of myself. Just going to the next room felt like someone asked me to run a marathon. I did end up making it through the work week and caught up on sleep that weekend.
The beginning of this week I felt like I was starting to feel normal again except that I was still having the numbness and pain on the left side. I was making it through the week with the sleeping fairly well but still feeling worn down. Wednesday I started feeling some pretty bad sinus pressure on the left side of my head and I thought it was just due to our lovely Ohio weather. It continued into Thursday and it started to feel a little more intense in the early afternoon. At this time I started to feel numbness in my cheek and occasionally in my month and tongue. This freaked me out a little as I had never had my tongue go numb. I called my neurologist office and left a message that I wanted to speak to someone about this. I wasn’t sure what was going on but thought I probably had some sinus issues and it was just putting pressure on a nerve that has already been damaged by…well, me (or I guess really my body attacking my nerves because for some reason it doesn’t like them). Well, after talking to someone at my neurologist office it turns out I am having another relapse but one that is focused more on the left side of my head. We came to this conclusion because of my symptoms and that I wasn’t having any drainage or cold-like symptoms so we basically eliminated the actual sinus issues.
I was a little upset after hearing it was probably another relapse. I was also upset to hear that they strongly suggested that I take it easy this weekend if possible. I tried to take it easy but it is hard for me to sit still especially when there are things to do, which there always are in my house. Plus I really wanted to get back to running this weekend. Well, tomorrow is the start of a new work week and hopefully can I focus on getting more sleep this week. And maybe finally posingt about my trip to Europe! New Post: Paris!
First night in Paris (And oddly enough me on only one hour of sleep and feeling pretty good. It was probably the Paris high or something.)